No tendency toward genius

August 31, 2005 at 3:41 am (Uncategorized)

There’s something so momentous–severe even–about that first blank page, as if whatever words squirm across it must be genius. Having no tendency toward genius, I usually leave it blank. Unfortunately, that doesn’t work for a blog, so voila: Post Numero Uno.

I’ve never liked beginnings. Yes, I actually appreciate an honest, aching, tear-filled goodbye more. Reunions are a completely different animal (who doesn’t love being picked up, swung around, and kissed long and hard by a man fresh out of basic training?). So forgive the fumbling introduction. Besides, I figured it’s only fair to tell you a little about me before I start criticizing anyone else.

Things I love: Candy apple red nailpolish. My grandmother’s stories. Really high heels (and tall men). Wind. Diet Dr. Pepper. Songs that make you feel like you can own the world. Long hot showers…with music. Vodka and mac and cheese at 4 am. That moment in a hairpin turn and a fast car when the car seems to be driving you. My ring fingers, both of them. De Nuncques’s, Nocturne in the Park. Figuring it out for myself. The conversations I can have with my mother without ever having to complete a sentence. The arguments I can have with my father that show me how brilliant he is, how unconditional his love is, and how much I have to learn. Holiday M&Ms. The Kitri variation from Don Quixote danced by Paloma Herrera. The West Wing. The memory of 300 strangers and some of my favorite people with their arms around each other singing “Sweet Caroline” in a bar and toasting the end of an era. First cars, first kisses, first loves. Second loves that dwarf the first. The smell of Old Spice sport stick mixed with Irish Spring soap. Jason Varitek. To do lists. Cartwheels. Forearms. The Sierra Nevadas in October. Laguna Beach (yes, I admit it). The view from Smith-Madrone.


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