Are smart, ambitious women screwed?

December 8, 2008 at 7:12 pm (On dating and mating)

At a bar in New York, an attractive woman was asked about her work. She explained that she’s a doctor (MD). The man who had been hitting on her replied, “You really should have just lied and come up with some other profession, it would have been so much more attractive.” 
Future Doctor Roommate came home from a girls’ night with the above story meant to illustrate that men, even men born in the 80s, are still intimidated by women who have degrees beyond their own. I immediately jumped to defend* the men I’ve known who were perfectly comfortable with their girlfriend/wife’s success…all three of them. Every other couple I could think of either met in graduate school or met when he already had his degree and before she got hers. Does my lack of a graduate degree actually make me more eligible? More attractive? Because if so, I’m not sure I want to be. 
*See how much I’ve grown!
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8 Comments

  1. Nilsa said,

    One of my best friends growing up was always smart. Really smart. She is now an emergency medicine attending at one of the best hospitals in our nation. And that scares the crap out of guys. Up until about 6 months ago, she has a wicked bad streak in dating. Guys can really be pathetic.

  2. So@24 said,

  3. So@24 said,

  4. anna said,

    was i one of your examples? we met after i had my master’s, and before R started (or even gotten in) to b-school.
    he doesn’t appreciate my ‘you didn’t go to real mit’ comments, but i guess that’s a little mean…
    🙂

  5. BS said,

    Nope, Anna, you make four! And I love that you can out-MIT R.

    So@24 – “do you want to really date someone who is freaked out by your phd??” Exactly. Guess it says something about my ‘type’ that two of the three examples that initially came to mind were exes.

    Nilsa – Maybe that explains why everyone on Grey’s Anatomy just sleeps with each other?

  6. Frog Thrower said,

    I am in total agreement with you. I don’t want to be more attractive just because I am not as threatening. 🙂

  7. Jess said,

    I’d say that you don’t want a guy who would be intimidated by your master’s degree anyway, right? But it isn’t always that simple.

  8. Jess said,

    I’d say that you don’t want a guy who would be intimidated by your master’s degree anyway, right? But it isn’t always that simple.

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