Ghosts of Girlfriends Who Would Never Give That Ass a Third Chance

May 26, 2009 at 7:30 pm (if I ruled the world)

Dear Hollywood,

If Matthew McConaughey isn’t going to remove his shirt, then whyinthenameofallthatisholy is he in the movie?


People for the Objectification of Men


Dear Hollywood,

In real life, Jennifer Garner’s friends would spend the couple’s happily ever after thinking that she had married beneath herself.




Dear Hollywood,

Is the sickeningly perfect Daniel Sunjata character still available? Because I could get over my aversion to doctors.


Revising My Top 5


Dear Hollywood,

Me again. You missed me, right?

I’m pretty sure no one’s still buying that whole “psycho bridezillas are hilarious” thing. Did Bride Wars teach you nothing?

With love,

Rational Women Everywhere


Dear Hollywood,

When did Lacy Chabert get that rack? Maybe she’s secretly related to Jennifer Love Hewitt.

With empathy,




  1. SoMi's Nilsa said,

    I was stuck watching Bride Wars on a plane once. And all I can say is, if I wasn’t on a plane with no reasonable form of escape, you can pretty much bet I would’ve walked out! Awful that people make money on such rubbish!

  2. Katie said,

    What? He doesn’t take off his shirt? Usually that element distracts audiences from the fact that he can’t really act. The director messed that one up.

  3. Hot Celebrity Hollywood said,

    Something is just not right.

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